I got this e-mail today.  It's not the first time I've had someone e-mail me about helping others going through divorce.  Last week it was a young girl dealing with a blame shifter. 

God in heaven, I'm happy to help people.  This letter is a major affirmation that my words do help and I'm grateful to God that I've had the ability to articulate words that help people move into action.

To Lars Hindsley –

 

I just felt compelled to write you to thank you for the thread you posted about a man’s guide to surviving divorce. My wife and I were married for 13 yrs together for fifteen and have three beautiful children. The oldest is not biologically mine but has called me dad since he was 2.  We had an amazing rollercoaster ride of a marriage that survived infidelity financial ruin, but also had some awesome times. We were separated for almost six months before she moved back in to try again. Two weeks before this last Christmas, she said she “loved me, but wasn’t in love with me” love that line. I had her moved out two days before Christmas and in her new place. For the first two months I was obviously devastated and completely shell shocked. I’d done, and I’m still doing a lot of self evaluation, and thought I had a good grip on how to relate to her and make our marriage what I’d hoped it could be. She said it was “too late”, go figure.

 

I found you thread, printed it out and read it religiously sometimes four or five times a day. I am currently learning the process of convert my old “doormat” self into the self-respecting confident man I used to be. Like you I guess I was ...   more »

In going over stats tonight I found one article was getting a ton of hits from this site: eNotAlone.com.

Seems my article on Blame Shifting found an audience.  I found that a great number of users from that site came over on a recommendation to read this article of mine: Understanding the Blame Shifter.

I wrote that article expanding on the concept of Blame Shifting from this earlier article: Blame-Shifting, your Apology Won't Be Necessary.