I have some advice for people today.  Do not wait for revenge. 

This is a deep thought.  Think hard now.  How do you avoid revenge at its most early point?  Do not put yourself in a position that could lead to your downfall.

It's best I explain by example.  You need to start a business and the nature of it requires a partner.  That partner should be someone you trust.    You need to make a solid decision early on or you could run into trouble.  If you make a bad choice and they have an agenda that hurts you.  You may feel so burned that you want justice.  If you don't get it, you could resort to revenge. 

The essence of what is inside a person in today's world can be impossible to know.  Some people play a part of a caring person while their actions go against everything they say.  You should follow your instincts but many of us do not.  Have you seen the film There Will Be Blood?  The protagonist in this story  Daniel Plainview never stepped out of "character" as the demon inside him never cared for anyone but himself.  He kept his cards of who he really was impossibly close to his chest.   A person like this is one where you must merely follow your instincts.  Despite him never revealing to anyone his weaknesses or what he cared for (actually he let on to the false half-brother) everyone around him should have read his actions and not his words.  

That is my advice to you today.  Do not wait for revenge.  Always be beyond it.

How is this possible? Here is what I know.

What people do is far more important than what they say.  Look at me.   Many days here I say a lot but few if any of you know what I do with my daily life.  What we say means so little.  Read people by what they do.  If you can't read a person by their actions, you should find someone else to draw close to if what you desires requires someone you need to trust, from work to love.

Love... Just like work this too is serious.  Love is serious business.  It is your fate, your future and can define your happiness.  Follow your instinct is what I advise.  What does your gutt tell you?

Try avoid the bad people in life that your instincts warn you of.  Have the strength to cut off bad business dealings before they become extremely hard to end.   I once said to business partner, "I can't just take my bat and ball and go home. I have to take a whole damn stadium."  I must warn you dear reader, as you build that stadium up from a sandlot park, know when to cut your losses to avoid any misgivings later, you'll avoid the notion of revenge in this way.

Beyond bypassing trouble, finding happiness within yourself is really your best bet. You could lose so much material wealth.  You could lose a loved one, you can lose out because you were tricked or taken advantage of, but if you seek revenge, it is a wasted emotion.   Let others fear the revenge from you that will never come.  That is their problem, not yours. 

Should you be burned by a business associate, co-worker, friend or lover, how do you avoid the fate of revenge?  Tune it out, forget it happened except to learn not to let it happen again. 

There is more than just staying away from the wrong people.  Look at me, I may be a smart man but I myself have had my share of unworthy company.  I've been used, it happened to me, it can happen to you.  It will happen.  We all face it.

So my next answer in not waiting for revenge is to prepare your own mind.  For one, it's not about anger.  I've seen plenty of people that seek revenge that show no outward anger.  It's not about keeping your cool.  Keeping your cool is basic and I assume you know the importance of that facet.

Preparing your own mind means peace.  You need to be at peace with whatever you have.  Basic needs should be enough.  We all entered this world without the big house or fancy car.  Neither will offer you anything at deaths door.  And in realty they don't offer you much in-between.  I once said to someone, "I've been poor before, I can handle it, you can't."  If there is revenge to be had, it is merely to never give up your own happiness, never let your adversary take that  from you and that is revenge enough that you did not dispense. If you face an adversary that places more value on material things in life you don't have to wait for revenge.  You are both well past it, and received it already.

I've heard the best revenge is success.  That is true, but I don't see the word revenge.  I see the word happiness.  The best happiness is success.  The best way to feel happy is to find success.  Success is different to many of us.  For me it is family, when I was a child I wanted to grow old with children and grandchildren coming to visit.  I wanted to be a part of them growing.  I wanted my own parents to be a part of that.  While I wanted to be a baseball star, football star and musician, I understood that those were just vehicles to a happy family.   But I can support a happy family in other ways and achieve my definition of success. The love of family is my success.

Ultimately the answer is to not feel the desire for revenge by knowing if someone hurt you or took advantage of you is to have a basic level of needs met that you are at peace with.  You can't avoid the pitfalls in life.  You can make yourself a person that is at peace with whatever comes down the road.

I wrote a song once called Revenge You Will Know.  I was 27 and a girlfriend that broke up with me just two months prior got knocked up by her new boyfriend.  This guy was not particularly good looking but he had his sights set on her. I was impressed with his will to sacrafice his paychecks for her.   He took her out to dinners, bought her anything she wanted and she provided him what he was after.   My friends in the band knew the situation as my lead guitarist's cousin was the guy after my girl... my ex-girl. :)  The question came up more than once... you gonna get him?  As in, are you going to get revenge on this guy?  I said, why?  She is with him and I still have my future.  That wasn't enough for the people questioning me. We had these great dinner outings after practices and the issue didn't end.  My solution?  A song.  :) I figured I'd write down my point of view in a song. I wrote: Revenge You Will Know. 

Dare I be what you want me to?
Dare I requite your point of view?
Then you’ll know what I bring to you.
Do you fear the revenge you will know?

It’s a Language I know you’ll hear with your eyes
You’ll feel me coming / bring you down to size

This is how its got to be
Picking apart your hypocrisy
 
The quietness was almost killing me.
But I had the power to requite the dream.

I still think about how I wanted my mates to understand I didn't need to act out in revenge.  And that if someone lived in fear of my revenge that never came... well that was their problem.   If they wanted to see what revenge meant to me, it was that I was right and that I had the strength to be happy in knowing the truth.  How I was right is another story and would only stand to confuse this article, forgive me for not explaining.

What inspired this article today?  After watching There Will Be Blood, I thought of how so many us have friends that we don't really know.  We have people in our lives that we should trust but do not.  It is a hard world to survive in during this age of overpopulation and technological wonder.  But throughout time it appears we all hate being taken advantage of.   In the case of Daniel Plainview, I've known people like him and they are scary people because the only way to know such an evil person is time.  You need time to see their core personality come out.   Times of stress where they show their true colors etc...  But then you may be too close to them and get burned.    And what is it I'm advising against?  Revenge.  It's a tough circle or cycle to stay out of.    To understand the people we need to avoid we need good instincts and need to know how to be at peace should they get the best of us.  Good luck.