This morning a friend and I were discussing in e-mail my article of my bands song Roses are Red.  While I was glad she liked it, I was commenting that the song actually had more “drive” when we were able to polish it etc...  Then she replied,

You should be proud of what you were able to accomplish.  Not many people get to live out their dreams...lord knows I have many of my own that will probably never see the light of day, but you got to experience it - even if it was a short period of time.  And now you will always have those memories and something to actually show for it...

This all made me think.  Yes, I’ve tried to live.  I did perform on stage, I did make the semi-pro football team, I did work on the cruise line, I did finally learn Kung Fu, I did really go for it and found a wife from Europe (could have went better but oh well), I have two children that I’ll share a lifetime with and I’ve done so many little things in between.  This year has been that time for me to go out there and do the things I couldn’t do before.   Life is for living.

So if you are reading this, I hope if you are recently graduated from school, or just divorced or in some way find yourself able to come and go with the wind... you need to live.  Life is not a test drive.  Some dream, some do.   Hang on to your dreams.  But even more, go after them.  I am. 

Later this year I’ll stun so many of you as I’m just not done yet....   more »

Don't ya just want a mouthful?  There is more than just one secret ingredient to a good raspberry cereal.  It's not just the raspberries, it’s not just the table sugar.   We put a bit of vanilla extract, confectionary sugar and sprinkle some cinnamon on top. The glass of concord grape juice makes a nice side.   If you are not on a diet, cream milk will really make it a winner.



You can also substitute your raspberries with cut strawberries or another favorite fruit. I've gone with pineapple and kiwi too. I don't think watermelon will work though, go with some common sense. ;)

This song is Roses Are Red.  It took our band 17 days from concept to final recording.  It was the very first song by Hard To Get and we knew from that day forward, we were good enough to produce nothing but original music.  I was always very proud of my lyrics and as the front man, I stood tall and eager to show the women of the world that I had as much substance to my romantic notions as I did words.  You be the judge.  I submit to you:

Roses Are Red (mp3 format)

It’s fast and furious

Hurts the way it should

Find ‘em hiding in the corners

Pain someone else once took

If you worked at love much harder

Their putting pepper on the ball

The working waves of passion

The weight of it all

I looked hard

I looked silently

And I fell hard

She fell hardly

What happened to me?

What happened to me?

I think out loud what’s happened to me?

Roses are red, Roses are red

If we had a fight I’d forget what was said

Roses are red, Roses are red

If love is blind I’ll get you out of my head

Now who’s to know the reason why rascals find love?

Is there something more important to accidentally find the one?

So who’s fooling who, no don’t change the rules.

We’re heading straight for danger, and I mean you!

I was a crazy cure she believed.

I was a flash on her, she could deceive

Now she’s a reckless hunter looking for me

And now I’m desperately focused to find myself free

Oh you want to find me serious, don’t you wish you could.

I see you fear’n in a corner ...love once misunderstood....   more »

You hit the spot.  Welcome to world of DangerMan. :)  Life is for living folks and music is the sound track to life.  Some of us don't need fur coats and money to make us happy.  Ah ... yes.   Life is for the living.   Get this playist into your Ipod baby and you're feet won't touch the ground...

Shalamar can get you started if you are at work.  We dance and laugh with it here at the hacienda all the time. :)

Patrick Wolf - The Magic Position
Shalamar - The Second Time Around
Jamiroquai - Virtual Insanity
Billy Squier - My Kind of Lover
ABC - Show Me (live at Hammersmith Odeon)
Metheny & Bowie - This is Not America
Frank Mills - Music Box Dancer
Graham Parker - Temporary Beauty
John Mayer - Waiting on the world to Change
Keane - Somewhere Only We Know
Keane - Thin Air
John Mayer - Neon
The Police - Wrapped Around Your Finger
Simply Red - Stay
Macy Gray - Finally Made Me Happy
Howard Jones - What is Love?
Del Amitri - Cry to Be Found   more »

So let the people talk
It's Monday morning walk
Right past the fabulous mess we're in
It's gonna be a beautiful day
So do the bluebirds sing
As I take your hand
And you take my kiss
And I take the world
'Cause out of all the people I've known
The places I've been
The songs that I have sung
The wonders I've seen
Now that the dreams are all coming true
Who is the one that leads me on through

It's you
Who puts me in the magic position, darling now
You put me in the magic position
To live, to learn, to love in the major key...
The major key, the major key, the major key.

And I know how you've hurt
And been dragged through the dirt
But c'mon get back up
It's the time to live
So give your love to me
I'm gonna keep it carefully
Deep in the treasure chest below my breast
'Cause out of all the people I've known
The places I've been
The songs that I have sung
The wonders I've seen
Now that the dreams are all coming true
Who is the one that leads me on through
It's you
Who puts me in the magic position, darling now
You put me in the magic position, darling now
Let me put you in the magic position, darling
'Cause I'm singing in the, the major key
The major key...   The major key.
Let me put you in the ...Major key!

Today I read a great article in Men’s Health magazine and had to sound off on my own.  It was about men being the “P” word around women.  What I’d like to discuss is more specific.  What are you afraid of?

This is not a men's only article today.   

Is it wrong for any of us to be afraid of anything?    When you were young what were you afraid of? Was it the bully in your neighborhood or school?  Perhaps it was being hit by a pitched baseball, or worse yet, someone lying about you.  For me it was two out of those three. 

PRINCIPALS

I had a kid in my neighborhood named Tommy.  He was much older and he always rounded up everyone to play games or sports in the neighborhood.  I didn’t like him for being such a bully and I rebelled at every turn.  He in turn beat on me.  I recall one time in a sandlot baseball game a ball was hit by me and he snapped at me.  I felt like... "he’s not my father or brother, he can’t talk to me like that."  So I threw my mit down.  He was pissed.  Tommy ran to the outfield and punched me out. I went crying home and my father was soon at his house and boy was he pissed.  I had not one but two black eyes and a swollen cheek.  In today’s world Tommy would have been arrested.   But back then, Tommy just continued to be an ass and I remember later being assaulted by him and four others; another story never to be spoken of.  I always stood my ground ...   more »

When I was about 26 years of age I began taking vitamin supplements for about two years; no big deal, I had the money to blow.  And that just it, taking supplements is blowing money because you pee all the vitamins out of your body which is all I ever heard from friends and doctors. Your body never retains them.  We’ll maybe two percent of the overall amount.  Which is good reason to not buy a supplement; again this is only my opinion.

Meanwhile here are the things I really go for in my diet.  It’s been this way for years and now I’m going to share my secret life with you. :)

B12

I lead an active life.  It used to be very active.  I played softball 5 days a week.  I came to believe I had a B12 deficiency because of short term fatigue. I found B12 may be my answer.  B12’s primary purpose is to create red blood cells.  But it does more; it helps with metabolism and more.  All good things. While I was always a big fan of B12 I gave up on taking that supplement years ago.  I recall playing softball using a dropper to put the liquid under my tongue.  I did nothing. Eventually I learned that although B-12 supplements such as spirulina may in fact increase risks of B12 deficiency.   In the end the solution was to consume B12 naturally.  You find it dairy products and eggs and in meat.  The good news is you can’t really overdose on B12 either. 

Lycopene

Next up is Lycopene. One of my favorite nutrients.   Lycopene is found in tomatoes of course. What does it do?...   more »

Power brings out the best in people and the worst of people.   -Lars H.

Dream no small dreams for they have no power to move the hearts of menDream no small dreams for they have no power to move the hearts of men - Goethe

Never work just for money or for power. They won't save your soul or help you sleep at night - Marian Wright Edelman

I hope our wisdom will grow with our power, and teach us, that the less we use our power the greater it will be. - Thomas Jefferson.

I love Jefferson's quote the most. Words to live by.

I'd like to dedicate this article to a friend.  She needs some strength now, and I'd like to share my advice in one word.  Forgiveness. 

Just finished my midnight skate ...again at 1:20 am LOL  And yes that toad was still there waiting on a bug.   The ground still rumbled under my wheels and the night, despite the air being thick... felt perfect.

I'm a glutton for punishment I suppose.  I skated all day it seems.  Only to skate again when I get home.   Lately I have more energy than I know what to do with.  I had a bowl of cereal this morning with fresh raspberries.  For lunch on the road I had a chilled salad and half a quart of concord grape juice with a banana.    For dinner, two steaks and ice-water and another banana. LOL  

But I heard a song tonight I have not heard in years.  Each word seemed to fit.  So I have forgone writing a book entry tonight for something a bit poignant. I really liked this song long ago, it really seemed rewarding and refreshing tonight.  I could wrote every word it seemed so fitting in it's spirit.   I'm in a fantastic place in my life now.  The moments I'm pensive are meaningful and optimistic, no longer a road to melancholy.  Tonight's skate felt great.  Great song...  To my friend that could use some support, I hope these lyrics can help you too. :)

Looking out of the window
Can't believe what I see
Where was all this beauty when I loved you
From now on this is my world
Yes we lost but I don't hurt any more
I knew there must be more to life than this

Now is the time for me
I'm grateful you set me free
Baby one ...   more »

Tonight I'm blogging on the move.  I just learned my son has met a girl.  Oh God. I'll be keeping a close eye on him as to what he thinks of girls.   Let's hope my discussions in the past about girls are to be treated with absolute respect have given my son a good foundation to which to treat women.   But alas, now I enter a new phase in being a father. 

I'm not going to discuss this any deeper than this, but I thought I'd let me readers know where I'm at in life in general. 

I've learned a lot in the past months.  About my life, my past life that I didn't know was taking place without my knowledge, about my future and more.  I've learned about forgiveness, even for people that don't deserve it, and about understanding.  I've learned it takes a bigger person to put others before themselves, and the reward is never what it seems.  But all those things pale in comparison of knowing my job as a father is about to get a bit more challenging.  OK... gotta hit the road soon.  This was an intense weekend.  By for now readers. ;)

THIS IS SERIOUS ROAD MAP TO HAPPINESS AFTER DIVORCE OR SEPARATION

This is a man’s guide to happiness after divorce.  Women need not read one word of this as it is something that may cut at your very core. No, that doesn’t mean this is mean spirited.  It is truly a man’s article for survival after divorce. There is NO woman bashing here, and although divorce requires separation of  a man and woman, this article is for men to understand your solution is NOT a woman.   And only if you use my solution, will you be able to return one day to the dating scene and make a good woman part of your life again.  Because the world is full of great women.   You simply, and unfortunately are separated from one you didn’t belong with.  And in time, you’ll learn how good it is for you to NOT have been with the woman you are now apart from.  However I cannot be any more clear to you men, and Emerson seems to agree with me, "We must be our own, before we can be anothers."

Ready to read this complete 5 page article?

There is a saying; you can only kid yourself for so long. I have to reflect on that today.

And I should say this straight first... I am not commenting on myself.  No, I’m thinking of someone else when I think of this saying.

I think in terms of someone wanting something that is not the way they want it to be, to be something else.  They want in a affect a lie they are telling them self to be true,  and they want that lie to be true for them so badly that they of course believe in their own lie.

That lie becomes a foundation for more lies.  And eventually a narcissistic person emerges for all to see.  Everyone sees a delusional person.  But the person telling this lie... they’ve got them self convinced everyone else is on board with their lie.  They falsely assume everyone is buying into their lie.  But it is indeed a solo effort.

At first people try to talk sense into this person.  Eventually, and frankly, people don’t want to hear it anymore and tune the liar out.  People around the liar go on as if they believe you but they don’t.  They just don’t want the drama.   They know the truth and they know the only way for them to maintain the truth is simply ignore your lies.

But when does it end?  When does it catch up with you?   When do you finally “get it.”  When do you finally understand that it is you that needs to look in the mirror, not everyone else? 

This is a burning question that every liar must eventually come to terms with....   more »

Tonight our little league play-off game suffered a rain-out. After a full day of pleasant weather and blue sky, rain showed up at dinner time.  It’s not the first time in my life that rain showed up at game time and then checked out after the game was cancelled.

So the question I once knew the technical answer to popped up into my mind again.  Why does it rain at the dinner hour, what causes rain to finally burst down upon us between the hours of 4 pm and 7 pm?  There is a reason.   Well there are scientific theories.  It has to do with air pressure.

Some rain is caused by high air pressure; some rain is caused by low air pressure.  It’s like you can’t win.  One of them is going to cause the clouds to dump on you.   In short you need three ingredients for rain:

1.      Moisture

2.      Unstable Air

3.      Lift

These three elements come together at dinner for a reason.  I’ll get to that next.

Convection Rain from Low Air Pressure – the evening rain

Warm ground + low pressure = rain

These are the short showers that show up, ruin your game and are out of here right after everyone has agreed the games are cancelled and have driven off home; and yes the sun comes out wouldn’t ya know it!

Why it happens is simple and unavoidable.  The sun takes the whole day to warm the surface of the earth.  That warmth of the earth warms the air.  That warm air rises up to the clouds and meets the cold air.  Bang, the rain dumps on us.  ...   more »

Every hero becomes a bore at last.  Who said this?  Emerson, Sachin and Saurav?  It doesn’t matter; what matters is it is true.

What stimulates my interest is that upon hearing this quote for the first time I thought back to my youth.  I was fascinated with becoming better than other men, wanting to be someone’s hero, a hero to girl.  It was such a silly notion, so romantic and needlessly wanted.  Because in time, somewhere between the time I thought of it first and the time I began penning poems I grew to understand that heroes fail too.  I wrote those very words to a young girlfriend I had lost to her own selfish desires. 

I asked myself what I had done to lose her interest, and I thought of my hero complex (for lack of better description), and what I had determined the answer.   I came to understand that if I were a hero, as hard as I tried even heroes fail.  The verse comes to mind, “heroes fail too, you know now they do.” 

Of course she didn’t know that.  My poem was meant to reveal that fact.  Perhaps it was too deep, she never gave me another thought.   If you are curious, I did in fact see her again.  It was 15 years later.  It was non-eventful for me, and I could tell it was embarrassing for her.  The girl I knew at 16 (I was 17) was now a grown woman.  I had my son, she had hers.  We exchanged pleasantries and I walked away from the moment thinking back at how I didn’t want to lose her those many years ago....   more »

SOFT PRETZEL RECIPE - WELL SUITED FOR PRETZEL DOGS

I’m a full-time father.  In our home you need to find new and interesting things to do all the time.  One great activity is cooking together.   With two young boys I found that baking is one of the better activities we enjoy as a group and they get to see what they’ve made ...and eat what they create.  Take for instance soft pretzels.  I’ve been working on this recipe and as I improve it, I’ll repost this article with better modified instructions.

LEARN FROM MY MISTAKES

Let me give you a bit of background.  I’ve been at this recipe for weeks now.  There were two problems I had immediately upon my first batch which took time to figure out the solution.  One was color, my pretzels were white, they didn’t look like Auntie Anne’s or even the cheap ones in the mall! My second issue was taste and texture.  They tasted bland and were dense in texture. 

This recipe is bulletproof.  The taste is honestly similar to an Auntie Anne style pretzel as is the texture.  They are brown all the way around too.  So take heart folks, if you’ve already bumped your nose on Internet recipes that don’t deliver, look no further. 

I’ve found no matter what recipe I’ve started with over time, the ones that are outstanding or really delicious are the ones using the lye dipping solution, I’ll get to that.  I do know I have some keys to making your pretzels come close to the type you taste from Auntie Anne’s and how you can have a great experience in baking. This recipe calls for Occidental ...   more »

I have a customer named Jessica Forde.  She is a French actress.  Her site is http://www.jessicaforde.com.  Some how over the years as I have with many customers we became friends.  Yesterday we were catching up as I helped her with a customer service issue. We talk about simple things, and I keep her abreast of my family.  Strange enough she and I talked last year and I can't help but think she saw my divorce coming.  Go figure. She lives in Paris and we got to talking about my opinions on France, the French people and the culture. 

If you know me, you may know that I know little of France outside of what my father told me when I was a young boy.  He traveled to France a few times and had a lot to share.  What little else I know of the country I know from pop culture, news and world politics.   I also had one story my ex told me of from a trip I paid for her to take with a girlfriend of hers.  She told me that when they spoke English the Parisians where rude to them, but when they spoke Russian, they were treated in a more dignified manner and got better service. 

I bounced this story off of Jessica and the stories my father told me.   In the end she taught me a whole lot and I must say my opinion of the French has been swayed a good bit.  Before this conversation my interest has been in visiting the south of France through the French Alps from northern Italy.  I've wanted to visit many smaller towns outside of Paris.  I even wanted to visit Paris itself for the museums and sights, but thought why bother if I'm going ...   more »

This is an open note to all my friends, girlfriends family you name it... :)

I am not skinny.  Stop using that word around me please. Do I call you all fat?  Yes I get the "that's not a negative Lars." comments, but I don't buy it.  You wouldn't say it if you didn't really mean, "Put on some weight".  

Not cool.  I'm working out like crazy and you all know it.  I'm rock hard and that seems to mean nothing.  I'm not skin and bones, I'm athletic.  I'm fit.  But you can't use those words can you?   What is the problem here?  Is everyone else just so pre-occupied with their own weight that they feel inferior to me or something?  What gives?  I got to the point I stopped and asked total strangers or people that knew me only slightly like my bank teller if I was skinny, her response, "You look better than people in magazines." 

So what is the problem here?  Look folks, if you are afraid to say something else just say it.   It's like you all got together behind my back and said..."Let's all call Lars 'skinny' this week."   When one person said it, I discounted it.  When two people said it I was thinking about it.  Now I'm hearing it more and more.  I eat right.  I eat healthy, I may do too much running and rollerblading and working out right now, but that won't last forever.  Give me a break would ya?  My arms and shoulders will get bigger and then what will every one complain about? 

Something is really weird here and it ain't me.  Not now anyhow.  Please lay off with the "skinny" word.  It wore me thin (yep, pun intended).

Lars

Have you been to the beach lately?   It seems to be getting harder and harder to find a secluded place you can enjoy on your own.  From the time I was a teenager with my buddies through my twenties and thirties I've seen the Delaware beaches become harder to access with less friendliness. 

Mind you I never liked our beaches, the water is dark, the water is cold and the surf is neither rough or tame; it has no character other than bland.    But these beaches are all I've got in driving range and for that I covet what little I got.   The beach towns get wider, the open space gets crowded out and before you know it, you have to walk a heck of a long way to a public space.  I can't say it's friendly to couples or families.   It's certainly no fun for groups unless you plan it out.  It comes down to having a beach home and fortunately I have a couple friends with that situation.  A buddy of mine working at a radio station and an old girlfriend that has been a friend for years... but that's me. What about so many other people stuck with a two hour drive and hoping a day trip will be fun?

Many times when I make a complaint I offer an answer.  Today I just have a complaint.  Bummer for us all. 

When summer comes it will change my mind

Forgotten lies stay blurred inside

What I lost was never mine

Looking out of these two eyes

I see...

Just one more season

Waiting for a memory

Waiting at a table; mind is reeling

Never mind the drink

I’m waiting for the sun to go down

The back bay’s where I belong

This is my town

When the sun goes down

When the crowd leaves town

I require your eyes

And your lonesome smile

One more season one more summer burning away (I know)

The Waterfront bades I’m overboard caught in the ebb and flow

What is it that makes us stop?

Not the sand at or feet

Not the risk of belief

Not the sun in our eyes

It was just a matter of time

One more beach bound daydream crime

One more season of chancing your mine

One less weekend left behind

Sailing off alone

My seasonal home

Moon on the grid

Withdraw foreboding relief

There’s a moon on the grid

I’ll tell you what it means

Moon on the grid

Grim and hollow

Mathematical love

One leads, one follows

Chance your power

the language of the soul is love

Leave the moon on the grid

true love will have won

Rationalize this fate or discover my name

For my eyes show my soul is embedded with pain

Your course is destined moon

Moon on the grid

Plot your course

Could it be changed once again?

Moon on the grid

You know its enigma is true

If your soul knows no love

It relies on riddles that give no clues

1984

I know where I’ve been and don’t want to go back

But my past follows behind on an inward relentless, incessant attack

The past stayed present, went on for years

In sight of my future trading innocence for wisdom

The past stayed present, it went on for years

My past lives with me can I live without fear?

Lost so much, gained little back

An awful price, for the faith that I lacked

Laden load ...of misery

Laden with efforts, that counted on me

So time encompassed a captured life

Looking but finding no answer in sight

A clever voice waited

Counted on my destiny

The one thing needed was a friend

Deception preyed on that need in the end

Here I am now waiting on you

And my mind is mine once again

This is not praise

No liberal view

Paths of misery

Are what I am testimony to

This courage in wisdom

Is Gods gift of time

                        April 14-15 1991