I had an argument once with a lover.  I have to tell you she was the first woman in years to provoke me into telling her what I thought of her.  Not how I viewed her on a whole but those little idiosyncrasies that if you mentioned, would hurt their feelings.   You know... those little things that annoy you about the person you are with, but you just don't say.  You find yourself just eating resentment for the sake of a safe relationship.   Well during what appeared a permanent break up  she broke me down or I just didn't care...  I let her have it.  Verbally.  I told her most every little thing that was wrong with her. Let also repeat, she provoked me.  Was I wrong to react? Absolutely but I should also be understood that I didn't draw first blood. It was her that said some ugly things meant to be cruel and inflict emotional pain.  One could argue that what is good enough for the goose is good enough for the gander.   (What's good for a girl is good for a boy).

In retrospect I think, why her?  We all have break ups.  Ninety-Nine Percent of mine are amicable.  Why then with the few others I've had unflattering break-ups with  had I chosen this one woman to insult?  To be dead honest, the reason I came to accept it,  is that in some of those break-ups I was the one being dumped.  I was the one that deserved better than to be insulted on the way out and instead of reacting, I responded without counter-attacking. I walked away without uttering a negative word.  But on the occasion I'm speaking of I lost some self-respect.   It was only so long that I could be a 'nice' guy before I finally cracked.  She was the unfortunate recipient of my ire.  Having said this, I could been more venomous with my words.  I  was restrained, but for all my restraint I'm left with this one fact.  I can't take those words back.  I believe I said them because I felt I wouldn't have to reconsider my words.   Still, I didn't need to worry in the past either yet I kept my trap shut.  

Of course in today's world, women don't fight fair either.  You can hold the winning hand of righteousness but proclaim it and they'll fight dirty for the sake of winning. It almost makes no sense.  I think that's another reason I'm motivated to just know what I know and leave unscathed.   Before I was married, I dated a girl that I caught cheating.  My friend called me from the restaurant telling me I should come see for myself.  When I did, I sat down and said, "Did I catch you at a bad time?"  Her reaction?  Days later she started calling the police accusing me of harassing her.   So even in the right you can find yourself being screwed over.  Better to just move on with the knowledge of being right. So if you women readers think men don't get their fair share of nut-jobs and stalkers... wrong.  I think another reason was I've seen men get run over by game playing and once again I let myself react as I felt like it was time a guy didn't just 'take it'.

I don't know how it is for all men.  I can only speak for myself but I'm not the type to argue.  If you piss me off, I'll   more »