Every hero becomes a bore at last. Who said this?
What stimulates my interest is that upon hearing this quote for the first time I thought back to my youth. I was fascinated with becoming better than other men, wanting to be someone’s hero, a hero to girl. It was such a silly notion, so romantic and needlessly wanted. Because in time, somewhere between the time I thought of it first and the time I began penning poems I grew to understand that heroes fail too. I wrote those very words to a young girlfriend I had lost to her own selfish desires.
I asked myself what I had done to lose her interest, and I thought of my hero complex (for lack of better description), and what I had determined the answer. I came to understand that if I were a hero, as hard as I tried even heroes fail. The verse comes to mind, “heroes fail too, you know now they do.”
Of course she didn’t know that. My poem was meant to reveal that fact. Perhaps it was too deep, she never gave me another thought. If you are curious, I did in fact see her again. It was 15 years later. It was non-eventful for me, and I could tell it was embarrassing for her. The girl I knew at 16 (I was 17) was now a grown woman. I had my son, she had hers. We exchanged pleasantries and I walked away from the moment thinking back at how I didn’t want to lose her those many years ago. Now I had just gotten custody of my son, she had a husband. Who would have ever thought? I saw in her eyes, she admired me again and because she knew so little of me... perhaps I was that hero again. We wall want what we can’t have.
And yes, I thought of my silly poem I wrote about her, us or life. It was a foolish notion perhaps but it was sincere. It made me think about how anyone can fail, how anyone can become mortal once the magic of just getting to know that person wears off.
I suppose with lovers it’s known as when the honeymoon ends, or “the honeymoon is over”. I’m happy to say I don’t suffer that feeling. When I was married, I never stopped loving my wife. Now as a single man, I must admit I think about that hero I always wanted to be. I think it silently drives most men. It does me; because I’ve always believed if I was to be worth something to any woman I needed to be worth more than most other men. I needed to be her “hero”. What growing mature in my thoughts taught me is that every hero becomes less exciting as you cozy up too close to them. The saying, “familiarity breeds contempt” almost applies. As you become close to any person, even a hero, you learn they are as fragile inside as any other person. They may not have the same failings as every other person, and you lose sight they have better qualities than other men (or women), but they do indeed still need to take the trash out, clean the floor, repair things around the house and other mundane acts that make knowing a hero at close range a bore.
Get to know a hero from up close and you realize they are just as fragile as any of us. A hero is short lived unless they die being a hero. A hero fades into the darkness and we forget how we once imagined them with respect and reverence.
What I get most of all from this excise of thought is that I stopped thinking of myself as a hero in the making for any woman. My aim is much higher now. :) My children see me as a hero and will continue to do so until they outgrow me...
Wow... isn’t that how it works for all of us with our heroes? We become bored with them as we outgrow them. Good luck to all you heroes out there.
